An Eye for an Eye

by WILLIAM H. WELLS

After a career that led from Harvard through publishing, advertising, government, and the United Nations, WILLIAMS H. WELLS is now living in Connecticut’s Litchfield Hills.

JANE, darling . . . are you asleep? No, dear. What is it?

I don’t, think you should have bitten the Carters’ little boy.

He bit Herbie!

I know, Jane. But why didn’t you let Herbie bite him back?

Herbie wouldn’t do it. He absolutely wouldoi ‘t.

Well—you could have spoken to Mrs. Carter.

She wasn’t home. And anyway. Barton, his mother wouldn’t bite him. She wouldn’t dare. He’s got her terrorized.

Well, then I could have spoken to his father. Jane, you just can’t go around biting little boys.

I don’t go round biting little boys. I only bit Ronald.

I know; but Jane, people won’t understand.

Ronald understood all right. He let out a yell you could hear for a mile. You didn’t bite him hard?

I certainly did — good and hard. I said to him, “Ronald, do yon know what it feels like to be bitten?" He said, “ No,” and I said, “ It feels like this.”

But darling, don’t you ever think of consequences ?

Of course I do, Barf on. I bet he won’t bite Herbie again.

I mean the consequences for us. Carter is going to nail me at the station tomorrow, or on the train, and he’s going to say, “My boy says your wife bit him. Did she?” And what can I say?

Say “ Yes.”

And he’ll say, “ How would you like it if my wife came over and bit your little boy?”

That’s silly, Barton.

What’s silly about it?

She hasn’t any reason to bite Herbie.

Jane, darling. You’ve got to let. Herbie light his own battles. If he gets bitten he’s got to learn to bite back — for himself. You don’t want Herbie to grow up to be a mama’s boy, do you ?

He’s not a mama’s boy. Herbie wasn’t afraid. He just doesn’t like to bite people. And anyway, I’ve taught him that biting is something he should never do. You want him to be a gentleman. don’t youY

Of course I do, Jane, but he’s got to defend himself. He can’t always hide behind your skirts.

I had slacks on. And he didn’t hide. He just didn’t know what to do.

He could have kicked Ronald.

He did. That’s why Ronald bit him.

And why did Herbie kick him?

Recause Ronald wouldn’t get off Herbie’s tricycle and let Herbie ride.

Why do you let Herbie play with a kid like that, anyway, Jane?

He likes to play with him. Ronald is Herbie’s special pal.

So you bit Herbie s pal. I suppose Herbie was watching?

Yes, he stood right there.

Darling, isn’t it bad enough to act like a mother tigress, without having Herbie there, looking on — gloating?

Herbie didn’t gloat, dear.

Thai’s good. What did he do?

Herbie kicked me.